Unit 3 Draft Workshops

For each of the following documents:

11/18: Draft Workshop Feeder 3.1

11/28: Draft Workshop Feeder 3.2

12/2: Draft Workshop Unit 3 Project Script

12/5: Draft Workshop Unit 3 Project Audio

1. Double-check that it is shared with my correct email (written on the board)

2. Double-check that the workshop is clearly identified with your name and the date of the workshop

3. Paste a pink to the Google Doc in which the workshop appears in an email

Send this email to me. If you do not include a link to a particular assignment I will assume that it has not been completed.

Instructions for Posting Your VoiceThreads

1. Go back to voicethread.unc.edu and click on the “My Voice” tab. Click on the VoiceThread you wish to post.

2. Click the menu icon at the top left of the screen then click “edit.” Click the button at the bottom of the screen that says “Playback Options” and enter 0 as the time to wait between slides and check the button that says “Start playing when opened.” Click the “Save” button.

3. Click the button at the bottom of the screen that says “Publishing Options.” Check the box that says “Allow Anyone at UNC to View.” Click “Save.” 

4. Click the button at the bottom of the screen that says “Embed.” Copy the code in the box labeled “Embed Code” (just clicking anywhere in the box will copy the code for you). Go to blogger.com, log in, and click the button to make a new post. Click the button on the top left that says “html,” then paste in the code you copied earlier. Give your post a title and hit “Publish.”

5. Ask a groupmate or friend to open the VoiceThread on their computer by going to your blog. If your friend can’t open it for some reason then I won’t be able to either and I won’t be able to grade your assignment! Please contact me if you have any technical difficulties posting to the blog.

Final Draft Workshop!

Since many of you are at different stages of the drafting process, today you will compose all of the questions for your workshop. You can either compose new questions entirely or you can copy and paste questions from previous workshops. Please include at least 4 questions.

1. 

2. 

3. 

4. 

Draft Workshop: Unit 3 Project Script

1. Does the script begin (i.e. in the first sentence) by telling the audience something they do not know? Is the author’s introduction one of the more effective or less effective introductions we talked about in class? If the script begins either with a rhetorical question or a broad declaratory statement (i.e. “Monet was one of the greatest artists of the 19th century,” “Abstract expressionists like Jackson Pollock sought to combine emotional intensity with non-figurative imagery”) work with the author to compose a more effective introduction and paste it below.

2. Does the thesis statement (as the assignment requires) make a strong and specific claim about the artwork’s relationship to a specific context? Does the thesis statement merely state that there is a relationship, or does it define that relationship specifically? If the thesis statement needs to be revised, work with the author to revise it and paste the new version here. In addition, does the thesis statement provide a road map for the rest of the essay and answer the “so what?” question? 

Compose two more questions addressing specific issues you are dealing with on this particular draft. You can copy and paste questions from previous draft workshops or compose new ones.

3. 

4. 

Link to Student Evaluation Forms

https://www.digitalmeasures.com/login/unc/student

Instructions for Assembling Your VoiceThread

1. In your browser, go to voicethread.unc.edu and log in with your ONYEN.

2. Click on the "Create" tab and then click the button that says "Upload." Upload each image that will appear in your VoiceThread.

3. Once you have your soundtrack completed in Audacity or Garageband, export your work as an mp3.

4. Open a new Audacity project (mac users: you will need to download audacity from http://audacity.sourceforge.net/), go to File > Import > Audio and open up the mp3 you just exported.

5. In order to split your audio track into separate files, you will need to insert a label at each point where the image in your VoiceThread changes. The first label should be at time 0:00. Place the cursor there (or press the home key) and go to Tracks > Add Label at Selection. Give the label a name like Section 1 (note: each label must have a UNIQUE name or the process will not work, so don’t name them all the same thing). Repeat this step for every point in your audio track where the image will change.

6. Once you are done with the labels, go to File > Export Multiple. Choose a destination folder for your mp3s and follow the prompts on screen. Audacity will split your mp3 into sections and place them in the designated folder. Note: if this is the first time you’re using Audacity you will need to download the file http://lame1.buanzo.com.ar/lame_enc.dll and, when prompted, tell Audacity where on your computer you saved the file.

7. Go back to VoiceThread and click the "Comment" button. Your first image should show up in a larger window to the right. Under the image, click the button that says "Comment," then click the up arrow that appears. Point VoiceThread to the file in which you exported the first section.

8. When you're ready to move to the next image / section, click the big arrow at the right of the VoiceThread or the thumbnail next to the arrow and repeat step 7.

9. For the sections of your VoiceThread in which you annotate the image, you will need to record the audio live. In the VoiceThread window, click "comment" and then click "record." Give the program permission to access you microphone, and it will record what you say. As you are recording you can draw on the image; you can change the color with the palette on the VoiceThread.

POSTING YOUR VOICETHREAD TO THE BLOG

1. Go back to voicethread.unc.edu and click on the “My Voice” tab. Click on the VoiceThread you wish to post.

2. Click the menu icon at the top left of the screen then click “edit.” Click the button at the bottom of the screen that says “Playback Options” and enter 0 as the time to wait between slides and check the button that says “Start playing when opened.” Click the “Save” button.

3. Click the button at the bottom of the screen that says “Publishing Options.” Check the box that says “Allow Anyone at UNC to View.” Click “Save.” 

4. Click the button at the bottom of the screen that says “Embed.” Copy the code in the box labeled “Embed Code” (just clicking anywhere in the box will copy the code for you). Go to blogger.com, log in, and click the button to make a new post. Click the button on the top left that says “html,” then paste in the code you copied earlier. Give your post a title and hit “Publish.”

5. Ask a groupmate or friend to open the VoiceThread on their computer by going to your blog. If your friend can’t open it for some reason then I won’t be able to either and I won’t be able to grade your assignment! Please contact me if you have any technical difficulties posting to the blog.

Draft Workshop: Feeder 3.2

1. In our introduction to Unit 3 we talked about the relationship between facts--or evidence--and more complex claims in the humanities. Do you think the author has done an adequate job of supporting his or her claims with objective facts about the piece(s) discussed? Point out at least two claims made about the piece(s) in the draft and explain how each of these claims is explicitly supported by reference to facts. If you think the claim could be better supported, suggest a fact about that painting that might help.

2. Does the draft adequately contextualize the piece under discussion? What kind of context (e.g. historical, aesthetic, etc.) does it provide? Does the contextual information seem more important than the discussion of the actual piece? If so, what might the author add or cut in order to put the focus back on the main piece? 

3. Is it clear how the author will use VoiceThread's visual annotation tools in order to help guide the reader through the image? Suggest ways in which the author might better use visual annotations in order to help convince the reader of his or her claims about the piece.

4. Do you think the audio track will hold the reader's attention? Has the author used music and other sound effects in order to break it up and make the information more digestible for the reader? Give any suggestions you might have for improving the audio track.

Recording Audio for Your VoiceThreads

Today we will begin recording audio for your Feeder 3.2 VoiceThreads. PC users will want to begin by downloading and installing the Audacity recording software:

http://audacity.sourceforge.net/

Mac users will have an easier time with GarageBand, which is probably already installed on your computer. If you don't have GarageBand, there is a version of Audacity available for Mac as well.

Once you have the software up and running, you may want to begin by recording your own voice and using some of the program's effects to manipulate the sound wave by cutting and pasting, overdubbing, or transforming it through effects. As we talked about during our discussion of the RadioLab podcast, these bells and whistles can be useful tools for orienting your listener, but remember that you want your listeners to pay attention to WHAT is being said, not HOW you're saying it.

As you get going, you may find yourself in need of sound effects and/or background music. As we discussed in class, you should be sure to obey the rules about intellectual property that we talked about. The following web sites provide free, legal samples that you can use in your podcast (note: some may require registration in order for you to download):

http://www.freesound.org/ (students have told me this is the best, most comprehensive, and easiest to use site)

http://www.freesfx.co.uk/

http://www.soundsnap.com/

http://incompetech.com/m/c/royalty-free/

http://www.musicalley.com/

Once you download these songs to your computer, you can drag them directly into GarageBand or add them into your Audacity project by going to File > Import > Audio. Once the sound is in your project you can use the program's tools to move it around and manipulate it just like you did with your voice.

We'll spend the entirety of today's class working on your audio tracks, and you can rely on me and your group members for help realizing the ideas you spelled out in your scripts. I will also be available during future class periods to help you troubleshoot any problems you run into. You can also search the web for general tutorials on podcasting or specific tutorials about making a particular sound or effect.

Draft Workshop: Feeder 3.1

1. The assignment calls for you to explore the context of the article’s thesis statement, identifying the controversy into which the author is entering. Has the draft adequately fulfilled this requirement? Does the author give an indication of why the article is important to art historians? Could the author add any information to make this context richer?

2. The assignment also asks you to evaluate the author’s evidence. Does the draft adequately explain how the article’s author has supported his or her thesis statement? Do you feel as though you can adequately evaluate the article’s evidence with the information provided in your draft? Explain your answer.

3. Art history provides a perfect example to bring in images and other multimedia content to help aid the reader. Has the author taken advantage of this ability? Explain how the author might use additional images or multimedia content in order to make his or her argument clearer or more meaningful.

Add two of your own questions to this workshop that focus on issues on which you desire feedback. Feel free to copy and paste questions from previous draft workshops or compose your own.

4.

5. 

Sample VoiceThread

http://unc.voicethread.com/?#q.b1546827.i8160362

Unit 2 Self-Evaluation

1. Overall, how happy are you with your work for Unit 2? Note any frustrations or roadblocks that you encountered and how you overcame them. 

2. Please take a minute to review the assignment sequence for Unit 2. As I’ve mentioned, this is the first time I have taught this unit sequence, so please mention any ways in which you think the prompts might be improved. What kinds of information would have been helpful to you as you worked on the project? Is any information in the prompts distracting or unhelpful?

3. What in-class assignments might have helped to achieve your goals in Unit 2 more quickly and easily? Examples might include explaining and developing new skills, modeling aspects of the writing process, etc.

Francis Bacon: Three Studies for Figures at the Base of a Crucifixion

Two-Tiered Workshop for Unit 2 Project

Organizational Assessment 

1. In what order does the author present his or her supporting evidence (e.g. chronological, process order, cause-and-effect, etc.)? Is this the most appropriate order given the audience's level of understanding? Suggest at least one alternative way in which the essay might be organized. 

2. Is there a sense of balance to my essay? Do I spend too long on any single point, or do I seem to rush through important parts? Does any section feel either redundant or underdeveloped? 

3. Does each paragraph have a clear topic sentence? Does each topic sentence relate clearly back to the thesis? Does each paragraph deal with one idea and one idea only? Point out any points in the essay at which the paragraphing seems weak or confusing.

4. Does the essay have transitions that move the reader clearly from idea to the next? Does the writer make the relationship between the ideas clear with words that emphasize the essay's organization scheme (e.g. time-related words of the essay is organized chronologically, etc.)? 

5. Does each paragraph fully explain its main idea? Do any paragraphs feel thin or under-developed? Point them out. 

Assessment 

If you did not identify any major conceptual or organization issues in your answers to the above questions, let the author know that s/he can move on to Part 2. If you did identify any issues, explain as clearly and specifically as possible what you think the author needs to do in order to get this draft to the "surface-level concerns" stage. Try to format these instructions as a plan, e.g. "Your road map doesn't match the organization of the essay as a whole. Once you make those match by revising your thesis statements or re-ordering your paragraphs, you should look at paragraphs 3 and 5 because they each seem to deal with several ideas rather than one." 

Part 2 

1. Does the draft achieve an appropriate take on the middle style? Highlight any words, sentences, or passages in which you think the essay deviates from a middle style (either by being too formal or too informal). If you have time, suggest ways in which the author might revise these sections in order to achieve a more appropriate tone for the assignment. 

2. Does the draft have a strong introduction that hooks the reader from the very first sentence? What type of introduction has the author employed? Does it get you excited as a reader? If not, suggest another idea the author might begin with in order to draw the reader in more quickly.

3. Does the author use dynamic sentence structures, alternating between simple, compound, and compound-complex sentences? Note any passages that seem to be choppy (perhaps because the sentences are too short) or too dense (because the sentences are too long and complex). 

4. The prompt asks you to make use of primary source materials such as photographs, interviews, etc. in order to support your claim. Has the author used these resources well? Does the author write credibly about his or her family history, or is more primary evidence needed? Does the author successfully achieve an analytical tone throughout the draft, or are there passages that feel more like a personal essay? 

Unit 2 Project Draft Workshop

Begin by reading the first paragraph of the draft and locating the thesis statement. Answer these next two questions about the thesis statement before you read the rest of the draft.

1. Does the thesis statement, as the assignment asks, make a substantial claim about the relationship between the author’s family history and a particular place? Is the claim too broad? Too narrow? Does the thesis statement do the other two things a good thesis statement should do? Note any ways in which you think the thesis statement could be improved.

2. In order to prove the claim made in the thesis statement, what other claims will the author need to make (and, of course, convince you of)? What kinds of evidence will he or she need to convince you of this claim?

Now read the rest of the draft and answer these questions:

3. Are there any claims you  mentioned in your answer to question 2 that the author did not address? Is this a problem? Do you think the draft would be strengthened by making these claim(s)?

4. Has the author provided adequate evidence to convince you of all of the claims that he or she makes in the draft? If the author were to add more evidence, what kind of evidence would it be? Where would it go in the draft? 

5. Are the claims and the evidence organized in a clear and logical manner that makes sense given the draft’s over-arching claim? Note any potential problems or ways in which the draft’s organization could be improved.

Authors: add two more questions about your draft for your partner to anwer:

6. 

7. 

Unit 2 Project Pre-Writing

Begin by creating a new Google Doc titled [your name]’s Unit 2 Project. Create a table with 3 columns, much like you did for your Feeder 2.1 pre-writing.

The Unit 2 Project assignment asks you to make a claim about the relationship between your family’s history and the place you studied in Feeder 2.2. Think about this relationship and brainstorm 2 or more possible claims that might form the crux of your Unit 2 Project thesis statement. Place these ideas in the left column.

In the center column, make a list of things you already know that will help you to prove these claims to your reader. These might be facts you discovered in your research for Feeder 2.2, things you already know about your family, or information from other sources.

In the right-hand column, make a list of other information you will need to find in order to prove your claims. Some items in the list might involve secondary research (such as academic texts on the history of your town, prominent figures within the town, etc.), or might involve primary research (such as interviews with your family members, searching through old photographs, etc.). 

After you have completed the activity, share your work with one of your group members. Discuss which claim(s) seem(s) the most promising, how they might be revised, narrowed or expanded, and what other types of research might prove fruitful both in proving your claim and in making it relevant to your blog’s readership. Revise and add to your lists as you discuss.

Paramedic Workshop for Feeder 2.2

Since last time was just so awesome, we will begin by modeling the Paramedic Method once again with Blayne's draft. You can access Blayne's draft by clicking here:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vGx2QjZDsqPf5psbHTtg6wsi3dv8XLp5WvOPgbNJAmA/edit

If you need a reminder about the steps in the Paramedic Method here's a link back to a previous post.

Once we have completed the model, perform the Paramedic Method on at least one paragraph of your partner's Feeder 2.2 assignment.

Critical Reading Activity

Up this point we've mostly looked at other students' writing, but from time to time it's helpful to remember that professionals still rely on the same fundamental writing skills that we learn about in this class. For this assignment, each group will read the assigned editorial from the New York Times:

Group 1: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/02/opinion/dowd-cain-not-able.html?_r=1&ref=opinion

Group 2: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/02/opinion/friedman-a-long-list-of-suckers.html?ref=opinion

Group 3: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/02/opinion/mr-corzines-big-bet-on-mf-global.html?ref=opinion

Group 4: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/02/opinion/how-to-prop-up-the-euro.html?ref=opinion

(Note: Registration may be required, but it only takes a minute.)

Within your groups, discuss your answers to the following questions and record your answers in a Google Doc. Each group need only create one document.

1. What is the article's thesis statement? Where does it appear? Does the thesis statement do the three things that we said all thesis statements should do? Explain your answer fully, noting in detail how the author fulfills each of these requirements. If you think s/he does not fulfill these requirements in the thesis statement, speculate as to why this is the case.

2. What kinds of appeals does the author make to his or her audience? Identify at least two specific appeals. Do you think the audience find these appeals convincing? Why or why not?

3. What kinds of research does the author employ to support his or her claim? Does this research come from popular, professional, or scholarly sources? If the author does not rely on research, how does s/he establish authorial credibility within the article?

4. Does the author employ strong paragraphing skills? Does each paragraph contain a topic sentences that expresses a single idea? Do all sentences in the paragraph explain that idea (and that idea only) fully and completely?

5. How does the author grab the reader's attention in the introduction? Can you categorize the introduction into one of the types we talked about in class?

6. Does the author employ a variety of different sentence types? Does the writing seem dynamic and powerful to you? Support your answer with specific details from the text.

At the end of the period I will ask each group to summarize their answers briefly for the rest of the class.http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/02/opinion/dowd-cain-not-able.html?_r=1&ref=opinion

Draft Workshop Feeder 2.2

1. Locate the original source on which the draft was based. Does it meet all of the qualifications of a scholarly source? Explain your answer.

2. One of the weaknesses in the class’s Feeder 1.2 assignments was in answering the “so what?” question. How does the author deal with that question here? Does s/he explain to the reader why they should be interested in this topic? If the author has not answered this question clearly, work with the author to brainstorm potential answers to the “so what?” question and note what you come up with here.

Authors: Add two more questions to this form. The questions should call attention to specific issues you grappled with while drafting or issues that you would like to address in the draft workshop. You can copy questions from previous draft workshop forms or you can compose your own questions.

Feeder 2.1 Draft Workshop

1. The assignment notes that the assignment’s thesis statement should convince your blog’s audience that your subject’s life should matter to readers. Has the author successfully done this (i.e. answered the “so what?” question)? How has s/he answered this question? 

2. Rather than simply presenting a narrative of the person’s life, the assignment should present an argument about how the subject’s life fits into a wider context. Examine the draft’s thesis statement. Does it make a substantial claim that others might challenge or oppose? While we’re at it, does it also lay out a roadmap for the rest of the essay? 

3. Are the details included in the body of the essay sufficient to prove the claim made in the thesis? Which details are the most important or compelling? For the details that are less compelling, how might the author make them more intriguing or memorable? (Hint: specific details are what interest readers!)

4. If the author were to expand the draft, how might he or she do so? In other words, at what points in the draft do you think “I want to know more about this?” 

5. Finish by writing at least two concrete changes the author can make in order to improve this draft.

Conferences on Working Thesis Statements

Rather than a formal draft workshop, today you will have individual conferences about your working thesis statements. Show your working thesis to one of your group members (but not the group member that the thesis is about!). Work together to verify 1. that the thesis statement fulfills the demands of the assignment and 2. that it is a strong thesis statement as judged by the criteria we’ve talked about in class. 

Work together to make any necessary revisions to the thesis statement.

Once you are finished with your conferences, begin outlining or drafting your essay or continue researching.

RadioLab Podcast Assignment (Homework over Fall Break)

We'll be working with the RadioLab podcast titled “Lucy.” You can hear it here:

http://blogs.wnyc.org/radiolab/2010/02/19/lucy/ 

or you can download the mp3 directly here: 

http://feeds.wnyc.org/~r/radiolab/~5/m9kyh3Sq7mk/radiolab_podcast702lucy.mp3

Read through these questions before you listen to the podcast, but answer them after you listen. As you are listening, compose a retrospective outline of the podcast. Post this outline along with your answers to the following questions in a new Google Doc titled "[your name]'s RadioLab assignment." Share this Google Doc with me.

1. What kind of “hook” do they use to draw in the listener? (Note: ignore the plea for money that precedes the podcast.)

2. Estimate what proportion of the program is based on extempore speech and what seems to be read from a script. How can you tell?

3. Note any background music or sound effects that seem to have been added in post-production. Why were these things added? How do they make the podcast clearer or more interesting?

4. Note any terms or concepts that you learned about from listening to the podcast. How were these explained? How did the authors make these complex ideas and terms easy to understand? 

Feeder 2.1 Pre-Writing

Begin by re-reading the assignment for Feeder 2.1. Choose which of your group members you will write about for Feeder 2.1. Have a conversation in which you establish basic facts about your interview subject--where they’re from, what their parents do, etc. You don’t have to get everything down now; you can do more extensive interviews later.

Next create a new Google Doc titled “[your name]’s Feeder 2.1 Pre-Writing.” After you create the document click on “table,” then “create table,” then create a table with 3 columns and 1 row. 

In column 1, write down everything you know about your interview subject. This can be information you gleaned from the conversation you just completed or things you have learned over the course of the semester. These things don’t have to be, strictly, facts… just assertions you are generally confident of. Try to write down as many things as you can, but make sure there are at least 6 or 7 items here. If you run out of things to say, try talking to your partner more or perhaps looking at their Facebook profile or other online sources of information.

In column 2, write down everything you might be wondering about your subject. For instance, if your subject’s family moved from Chicago to North Carolina ten years ago, you might be wondering why they moved, what the subject’s parents' careers are, etc. You might also wonder what the subject thought of North Carolina upon moving here, or what his or her parents thought. Did they anticipate the move? What were they sad to leave behind? Were there unexpected discoveries once they got here? Try to spin out as many subjects as you can… remember, this is the brainstorming stage, so there are no wrong answers and you won’t be able to research all of these topics.

In column 3, write down how you will go about finding out the answers to the questions you posed in column two. You will almost certainly need to interview your subject again, so that goes without saying; you might think of questions you want to pose at later interviews, or other ways of drawing out the information you want. You might also need to interview the subject’s relatives or friends or perform other kinds of background research about the places, people, and things in the subject’s life. The column is for figuring out how you will go about gaining the knowledge you will need to complete Feeder 2.1.

If you finish before the end of class you can begin research for your Feeder 2.1 assignment. If any new items for your 3 columns occur to you during your research, please return to this assignment.

Unit 1 Self-Assessment

Take a moment to look back at the earliest drafts of your Feeder 1.1 and 1.2 assignments. Think about how you have grown as a writer over the past 8 weeks. Next, answer each of the following questions with a short paragraph of 3-4 sentences.

1. Which class lessons have had the most impact on your writing? Which ones have had the least? Why?

2. Have you found the draft workshops helpful? Why or why not? Do you have any suggestions about how the peer review process can be more efficient or productive?

3. Do you feel like the in-class assignments and draft workshops helped to move your writing through the conceptual, organizational, and surface-level stages? Did you get stuck at any one of these stages during any of the assignments? If so, explain why.

4. Do you think any of the concepts or lessons covered in the course so far need additional clarification? How will this clarification help?

When you're done please email your responses to me. Please place your responses in the body of the message rather than as an attachment.

The Paramedic Method

1. Circle the prepositions (of, in, about, for, onto, into)

2. Draw a box around the "is" verb forms

3. Ask, "Where's the action?"

4. Change the "action" into a simple verb

5. Move the doer into the subject (Who's kicking whom?)

6. Eliminate any unnecessary slow wind-ups

7. Eliminate any redundancies.

Link to model draft

Another Unit 1 Project Workshop

Organizational Assessment

1. In what order does the author present his or her supporting evidence (e.g. chronological, process order, cause-and-effect, etc.)? Is this the most appropriate order given the audience's level of understanding? Suggest at least one alternative way in which the essay might be organized.

2. Is there a sense of balance to my essay? Do I spend too long on any single point, or do I seem to rush through important parts? Does any section feel either redundant or underdeveloped?

3. Does each paragraph have a clear topic sentence? Does each topic sentence relate clearly back to the thesis? Does each paragraph deal with one idea and one idea only? Point out any points in the essay at which the paragraphing seems weak or confusing.

4. Does the essay have transitions that move the reader clearly from idea to the next? Does the writer make the relationship between the ideas clear with words that emphasize the essay's organization scheme (e.g. time-related words of the essay is organized chronologically, etc.)?

5. Does each paragraph fully explain its main idea? Do any paragraphs feel thin or under-developed? Point them out.

Assessment

If you did not identify any major conceptual or organization issues in your answers to the above questions, let the author know that s/he can move on to Part 2. If you did identify any issues, explain as clearly and specifically as possible what you think the author needs to do in order to get this draft to the "surface-level concerns" stage. Try to format these instructions as a plan, e.g. "Your road map doesn't match the organization of the essay as a whole. Once you make those match by revising your thesis statements or re-ordering your paragraphs, you should look at paragraphs 3 and 5 because they each seem to deal with several ideas rather than one."

Part 2

1. All of your drafts are probably aiming for a middle style. Go through your partner's draft and highlight any words, sentences, or passages in which you think the essay deviates from a middle style (either by being too formal or too informal). If you have time, suggest ways in which the author might revise these sections in order to achieve a more appropriate tone for the assignment.

2. Since writing in the middle style is targeted at a fairly wide audience, unfamiliar terms and concepts need to be defined. Examine the essay and point out any terms that aren't defined that probably should be. For the terms that are defined, are these definitions clear and concise? Does the reader understand everything s/he needs to in order to understand the author's point?

3. Another aspect of the middle style is that it employs concrete nouns (rather than abstract nouns) and action verbs (rather than "to be" verbs). In general, does this essay feel concrete (that is, grounded in things you can see and touch) or abstract (that is, in the world of ideas) to you? Do you think the essay's level of abstraction is appropriate given the audience and the topic? Point out any specific passages in which you think the paper gets too abstract. If you have trouble locating these passages, try searching for "to be" verbs; they often cluster around these types of passages.

4. Did you notice any examples of contentious terms or insensitive language in the draft? If so, point them out and suggest how the writer might replace this with more sensitive language.

Draft Workshop #2 for Unit 1 Project

Trade papers with someone in your group other than the person who read your draft earlier in the class period. For your partner’s draft, write at least one substantial paragraph explaining whether you think the author’s priority, at this point in the composition process, should be conceptual concerns, organizational concerns, or surface-level concerns. Support your claim with evidence from the author’s draft, and point toward specific revisions that the author needs to make before moving on to the next level of concerns.

Draft Workshop: Unit 1 Project

1. Does the thesis statement accomplish all three things that, according to our lessons, a thesis statement should accomplish? Briefly summarize how the thesis statement makes a substantial claim about the essay's topic, lays out a roadmap for the rest of the essay and explains why the audience should care about the topic.

2. What kinds of evidence does the author cite in support of his or her claim? Is this evidence compelling? Is it enough to make you believe the claim put forth in the thesis statement? Why or why not?

3. What kinds of appeals does the author make to his or her audience (e.g. logical, emotional, ethical)? Are these appeals appropriate or convincing for the blog / essay's audience? Why or why not? Could the author effectively employ any other types of appeals?

4. Briefly describe the general tone of the essay. Does the author's tone come off as credible given the topic and the paper's audience? Has the author established a solid, reliable persona? Explain your answer.

Activity: Paragraphing

Together with your group, examine each paragraph in the model draft for its relationship to the thesis, unity, coherence, and adequate development of the paragraph's main idea.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1SZPW1o-bYdWHdyHpXWBjEvzXmZmGo4zItDrrpdvSzU8/edit?hl=en_US

Create a new Google Doc in which you explain briefly how each paragraph might be improved. You can be as brief as possible, but more complex problems might require a bit more explanation. Each group need only create one document.

Activity: Reading Sources Critically

Begin by composing a retrospective outline of the key article you brought in to class today. Follow the procedures we talked about in class last week, beginning by identifying the author's thesis statement or central claim and identifying the central claim or idea in each paragraph. If your article is very long, please complete the outline for at least 6 paragraphs. Add your retrospective outline to your Unit 1 Project Google Doc, share it with me and your group members, and in the same document complete the following tasks:

1. Describe, in a few words, the article's organizational scheme. Is there an order or a logic to the way the article unfolds? Why do you think the author chose to present the information in the order s/he did?

2. Identify at least three or four SPECIFIC places in which the author makes an appeal to his or her audience. For each appeal, note whether the author relies on ethos, pathos, or logos, and briefly explain why this appeal would be convincing for the author’s audience.

3. Note any places in which the author addresses a counter-argument to his or her thesis. Summarize both the counter-argument and how your author responds to it. Does this counter-argument prompt your author to limit his or her claim in any way? If so, how?

4. In order to write authoritatively about the subject you have chosen you will probably have to do more research on the topic. Jot down some notes about where you think this research might take you. Are there any specific references in the article that you should track down? Will you be looking for scholarly sources or popular ones? What kinds of search terms might you use? How will the research you find help to shape your argument and make it convincing?

5. Finally (and this is a tough one!) ask yourself, "what is missing from the article?" Are their any ideas, opinions, arguments, or references that seem to be missing, left out, avoided, or not addressed? Is there any aspect of the topic that the author just doesn't want to deal with, at least not in depth? Speculate as to why the author made these omissions, and how exploring these areas might be useful to you as you develop your own counter-arguments.

In-Class Activity and Homework

Continue researching for your Unit 1 Project. In the Google Doc for your Unit 1 Project (which you will need to create if you haven't already), write 2 or 3 sentences about what types of appeals you think will be most useful for your project given your audience and topic. Using the research skills we have developed in class, work on finding sources (both scholarly and popular) that will allow you to construct those appeals in your essay. Keep a working bibliography of the sources you find in your Google Doc.

Homework:

Bring in at least one secondary source (preferably a scholarly one, or failing that a detailed popular source) that will be integral to your Unit 1 Project.

Activity on Appeals

Read the following article from slate.com:

http://www.slate.com/id/2267094/pagenum/all/#p2

This article contains appeals of all three types: ethos, pathos, and logos. Work in your groups to identity at least one of each type of appeal in the article. Which of these appeals is most persuasive to you? Why do you think that is the case? In which order does the author present these appeals? Why do you think he chose that order?

Draft Workshop Feeder 1.2

Begin by composing a retrospective outline of your partner's paper, using the outline we composed of the Huckleberry Finn paper as a model. Once you have completed the outline, examine it for coherence, repetition, orderly logic and transitions, and whether it fulfills the demands of the prompt. Suggest any changes that you believe would improve the paper's sense of organization.

After you're finished, answer the following questions at the bottom of the draft:

1. Briefly describe the current draft's organizing principle. Could the information be organized in another way? Suggest a different organizing principle that would change the draft radically while still making sense, and revise the thesis statement to reflect this new organizing principle.

2. The prompt asks you to make the argument that the information summarized is relevant or interesting to your blog's audience. How does the author do this? Is the strategy effective? Suggest another way in which the author might have related the information summarized to his or her audience.

3. Describe the draft's introduction, concentrating on the first sentence. How does the author attempt to "hook" the reader? Does s/he begin by telling the reader something she doesn't know? If not, scan the body of the draft and/or the original article for an interesting fact that the author could place at the beginning of the essay.

Your Blog's Citation Conventions

Using the formal APA, MLA, and Chicago styles (refer to the relevant sections on the Library's Citation Tutorial (http://www.lib.unc.edu/instruct/citations/) for details), work with your group members to draft a rationale for how and why you will cite your sources on your blog. Compose a short, 2-3 paragraph essay that explains:

1. Why your group thinks that citing sources is important.

2. How citations will be implemented on your blog. This should take the form of a rough style guide like this one for MLA format: http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/747/06/. You need only explain the format for the types of references you anticipate using most on your blog.

3. A short rationale for how and why you chose the citation style you agreed upon.

Post this essay to your blog by class time on Friday, September 23.

Why We Cite Tutorial

Go to the library's tutorial on citations and complete the section "Why We Cite:"

http://www.lib.unc.edu/instruct/citations/introduction/index.html

You can stop reading when you get to the section about APA citations.

Draft Workshop Feeder 1.2

1. We just finished talking about several different types of effective and ineffective introductions. What type of introduction does the current draft have? Is it one of the effective or ineffective introductions? Explain how you determined which category the introduction fits into.

2. How does the author answer the "so what?" question? In other words, why does the author's argument matter to his or her readers? At what point in the draft does the author establish this answer to the "so what?" question? Could it come earlier? Explain your answer.

Pre-Writing Assignment for Feeder 1.2

Arrange yourself into groups of 2 or 3 within your group. Show your partner the article you plan to write about for Feeder 1.2. Let your partner look it over and confirm that it is a scholarly source. If there is any question about the matter please call me over to help.

Next, get started on the introduction for your Feeder 1.2 assignment. As I noted in class, the introduction is where you explain to your audience why your article matters specifically to them. Draft at least two different introductions that avoid clichés and meet the other criteria for a good introduction that we talked about today in class. Add both introductions to a new Google Doc, where you will keep all of your work for Feeder 1.2.

PowerPoint on Scholarly and Popular Sources

https://docs.google.com/present/edit?id=0AV1JiXOw1yx0ZGN6OHp0dHpfNmZkZ3N3amRj&hl=en_US

Posting Feeder 1.1

Work together in your groups to post your Feeder 1.1 assignments to your blog. At this point your group may need to finalize some aesthetic choices such as font size and style, how you will include images and other multimedia content in your posts, etc. If you run into technical problems, work within your groups to resolve the issue.

After everyone has posted their assignment, review your blog as a group to make sure that your posts are formatted similarly and share the same look and feel that your group’s members have agreed upon for your blog.

Thesis Statement Workshop Feeder 1.1

Identify your partner's thesis statement. Copy and paste it into the bottom of the Google Doc and then answer the following questions about the thesis statement. Please be as clear and as detailed as possible:

•       Does the thesis statement answer the question posed by the assignment?

•       Has the author taken a position others might challenge or oppose?

•       Is the statement specific enough?

•       Does the statement pass the “so what?” test? Are you telling your audience something they don’t already know?

•       Does the thesis pass the “how and why” test?

Once your partner finishes reviewing your thesis statement, work together to revise both of your thesis statements. Once you have finished revising both of your thesis statements, answer the following question about your own draft. Type your answer at the bottom of the document.

We have noted several times that the thesis statement provides a roadmap for the rest of your essay. Thus, revising your thesis statement often entails revising the rest of your essay as well. Think about the model Feeder 1.1 essay we looked at; how would the body of that author's essay change in light of the revisions we made to his thesis statement? As you revised your own thesis statement, did your roadmap change? If so, explain in 3 or 4 sentences how you will need to revise your essay in order to make it consistent with your new thesis statement.

Revision Activity 9/12

Over the weekend one of your group members should have read your draft and responded to the draft workshop forms posted on Friday, including composing a list of three revisions you could make to improve the draft. Closely re-read both your draft and your partner’s answers to the draft workshop questions, then add at least two more items of your own to the list of revisions you could make to improve your draft. Before Wednesday’s class revise your draft to address the issues raised on your draft workshop form. You should arrive at class Wednesday with a draft you consider very strong and ready to post.

Sample Draft Workshop

http://btd0902.blogspot.com/2010/11/literary-analysis-of-dark-brown-dog.html

Sample workshop questions: discuss your answers in your groups.

1. What is the author’s main claim? Is it stated clearly? How could the author better highlight his central claim?

2. Does the author successfully achieve an analytical tone? Are there any passages that seem like mere plot summary rather than analysis? Note these passages and explain how the author might add in an analytical component.

3. What particular formal features of the story does the author point out and analyze? Did any of the analysis of these features feel incomplete or under-developed? Though you have not read the story, can you suggest any other formal features that it might be helpful for the author to analyze?

4. How has the author attempted to grab the reader's attention? Do you think this strategy is effective? Think back to your reaction when you read the first few sentences of the draft… did you groan or were you pulled in? Explain your answer in as much detail as possible.

After you discuss these questions, compose a list of THREE things that the author should do to improve his or her draft.  Post this list and your answers to the workshop questions in a Google Doc and be sure to share it with me. Each group should have only one Google Doc.